Saying ‘yes’ to guidance

Last night I received an inner urging to go cut some roses and give them to the lovely Russian grandmother who lives across the street and always admires my roses.  This multi-generational family moved in a few years ago and last year the grandparents bought the home next door to the younger generations’ home.  They have worked day and night renovating the place…very hard-working people.  They have seemed to be very nice people, but I have not made a huge effort to befriend them.  Truthfully, I did not even know all their names.  So, offering the roses seemed a little way to be more neighborly.   When I crossed the street with the roses, the daughter was out in front and told me it was her mother’s birthday and she would love the roses!  Their front  door was open and when I called out to them, both of them came to the door and greeted me warmly.  As I was ushered in to the kitchen, I saw two dozen perfect, beautiful florist’s roses.  When I laughingly said she didn’t need my imperfect little bouquet, both of them replied that mine were “special.”   They proudly showed me around their home, all the improvements they had made, which were really lovely.  Our conversation was somewhat awkward, with their halting English and my almost non-existent Russian, but the connection was heartfelt and delightful.  It was such a blessing to have followed the guidance I’d received and to have made such a warm connection to my neighbors.

I often pray that I will get such clear and followable guidance.  I think perhaps I do get such guidance more often than I think, but that I don’t listen or don’t WANT to listen and follow through, for whatever reason.  After such a wonderful experience, I may change the prayer:  that I may hear and say ‘yes’ much more often!

INQUIRY

What is your experience with following guidance - or not listening?  Do good experiences make you want to say ‘yes’ more often?

Holding on to shame, continuing to harbor negative feelings about our sense of shame, severely limits us from being who we’ve been created to be - we don’t feel great about ourselves because we’re ashamed, feel less than, having to hide something; we aren’t as open as we’d like to be, particularly if we’re seeking authenticity, which so many of us are today.

What kinds of things do women feel shame about?

Well, there are the “big” things lying, cheating, stealing (…oh, Lord, I hate to admit it, I’ve done all of those things at one time or another). The things we did do and the things we didn’t do. And the other things we wouldn’t particularly want our neighbors or colleagues to know about us.

Where does your body hold shame?

Often shame lodges in the belly and/or solar plexus. Begin to notice where you feel your body reacting to the shame you feel about a shame-inducing incident. It feels to me like I’m pulling in, hiding, covering myself.

Go kinda easy on yourself

One of the gifts I’m receiving is an opportunity to heal huge amounts of shame I’ve held on to for years, as well as the more recent stuff. Although some of it feels pretty crappy, there is also space and a peace, particularly as I can open up and let God into those dark and lonely places. I am so grateful that I can see the benefits of this process – as it’s pretty foul stuff that’s coming up. This is what I’ve been asking for…to be clean and used by God. Wouldn’t it be great to appreciate more of our process/journey? Hopefully, more and more with time - I guess this is part of the process, too! It’s not an easy process, but I can feel it will be well worth it.

INQUIRY:

How would your life be more fulfilling with less shame?

“Whatever I choose, I want to be more expressive in all aspects of my life. I’m searching for a really vibrant and fruitful existence. I still believe that the journey, not the arrival, matters. To me, the quest is always more important than the accomplishment.”
- Anthony Hopkins

What does it take to develop that ability to recognize that the quest is more important than the accomplishment? One thing would definitely be to learn to really appreciate the steps along the way; to be able to appreciate the learning, whatever it may be.

I love working with Carol on this spiritual direction stuff. I am just loving being more and more in touch with God…having more and more of an awareness of His presence in my life. I love thinking of myself as being one of God’s girls…no matter what my age. Having that glow, being vibrantly alive, no matter what other people think, because God’s opinion is the only one that matters…and He loves me being vibrant!

The definition of a “Toleration” is anything that you are putting up with. Tolerations distract our attention; eg. “I really need to fix that…” and siphon our energy.

Today I was presented with an opportunity to clean up something that was, in the grand scheme, not a huge deal, but in the short term was eating at me.  I’d not been completely honest about a situation and knew that if I kept silent, it would bite me down the road.  So despite the intense dread, I made a couple of phone calls, left barely coherent messages, got the return calls and set the record straight.  Not pleasant.  Will have to live with some repercussions, but feel a lot better and was actually commended for the courage it took to make the calls.  I’d like to think that this was such a great lesson that I’ll do better from now on, but as I keep growing and trying to clean my heart and soul to be a clearer reflection of the Divine, I imagine there’ll always be more and more subtle cleaning that takes place.  I hope I learn to love this!!

Always do what you are afraid to do.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

A number of years ago, I had a favorite devotional I used in my recovery program. Somewhere along the line, it fell apart and I probably tossed it. I can’t remember the name and I haven’t been able to find another copy, but I DO remember one of the stories that really touched me & I loved reading it! In the story a mother, grandmother, and little girl go to a restaurant and the waitress takes the orders for the two women and then turns to the little girl and asks what she would like. The girl’s mother starts to answer, but the waitress raises her hand to stop her and again, turns to the little girl and repeats her question. The little girl joyously gives her order, the waitress smiles, says “Coming right up!” and begins to walk away. The little girl excitedly says, “Mommy! Mommy! She thinks I’m REAL!”

I get a little teary when I think of the story…how many of us didn’t feel very real growing up? Even now, it often feels that people are so hungry for been seen for who they are, rather than what they’re doing.

By TwitterButtons.com

“No one of us has escaped a special plan. And everyone of us is inspired in particular ways, with particular talents.” Author unknown, Each Day a New Beginning

There comes a time for many of us when our life feels like that darkened room. We’ve followed the beaten path, the familiar path, but now some inner nudging is urging us to move on to a new road. We do have choices: we can keep following the well-worn path or blaze our own new one. One we can clearly discern; the other, barely, if ever, trodden. But what choices! Robert Frost wrote in The Road not Taken,

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth…

…I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I–
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

For some of us, it’s time to take a new road, perhaps a path that has not yet been blazed, yet is our path. And one we must take for our own growth, perhaps our own sanity. Maybe inner guidance is saying “This way. This way.” But as we look down, there’s no trail in front of us. No clear path to follow. Our inner guidance lets us know, the clear-cut path is not for us…we’ve passed the point of no return. We’re having to forge ahead, perhaps slowing our pace to an excruciatingly slow crawl, feeling along every millimeter, trying to find our openings. As we muddle along, learning to hear our guidance more clearly and feel for those openings more gracefully, our hearts begin to remember their purpose and say “yes.” And as that happens, our way is made lighter and more joyous. Given our world today, it is especially important that we each recognize and work at fulfilling our “special plan.” Each day, take a step along your path, even if it is a tiny one. If you need help, ask for it. Be in communication with your inner guidance - listen and heed its advice. When your heart says “yes” - move with it! It knows the way home.

Did you know that whenever you feel love, you literally begin to glow? You probably did.

But did you know that the glowing is actually made up of zillions of minute sparkles? And that these sparkles receive as much energy as they create? And that because of this energy exchange you completely stop aging and look younger? Abundance is immediately drawn to you? Healing powers fill you? Muscles are strengthened, pounds are shed, and your vision improves? Lingering questions are answered? New friends are summoned? Old friends are poked? Problems are solved? And maple syrup tastes more maple-y?

All when you feel love.

It’s true -
The Universe

Can you feel your sparkle? Just imagine what you’d feel like if you knew, really knew you were sparkling…even now!

I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated…

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

What is required is a willingness to change a point of view AND, frankly, a bit of patience while developing the skill of shifting perspective. If we’ve been stuck in a rut of negative thinking, listening to “gremlins,” or whatever we may call it, shifting the thinking may take a while. Why? Because this thinking is likely deeply ingrained…much more so than you would ever guess.  And so much so that you probably rarely even notice it…until you’re feeling bummed or blue or out of sorts.  But, in that blueness, you’ve got a great opportunity! You can reclaim your power to make life miserable - or joyous! Or not - and isn’t that a point of power to be able to choose even that? Enjoy your whine when that’s what you’ve chosen!

If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.
Lewis Carroll

Jack Canfield writes “In order to get what you want, you must first decide what you want.”  And in his article,  Decide what you want in 2009 lays out some simple steps to getting where you want to go.

We’re living in interesting times… I’m reminded that I’ve heard the Chinese symbol for “crisis” is made up of one for danger and one for opportunity (this may or may not have some validity - check this out).    But back to interesting times…we’re living in them…are we making the most of them?   Where do you want to go this year?