Living music

Filed Under Gratitude, Sparkle, Success | Leave a Comment

The Music
For sixty years I have been forgetful,
every minute, but not for a second
has this flowing toward me stopped or slowed.
I deserve nothing.  Today I recognize
that I am the guest the mystics talk about.
I play this living music for my host.
Everything today is for the host.
- Rumi
What if we lived our lives as though we were the Living Music?  Would we be living differently?  What would be different?

well behaved women

Filed Under Authenticity, Coming out of hiding, Sparkle | Leave a Comment

Well-behaved women rarely make history. - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

Laurel Thatcher Ulrich wrote those (or very similar) words in an article, Vertuous Women Found: New England Ministerial Literature, 1668-1735 . American Quarterly, Vol. 28, No. 1 (Spring, 1976), pp. 20-40
doi:10.2307/2712475

“Cotton Mather called them the “the hidden ones.” They never preached or sat in a deacon’s bench. Nor did they vote or attend Harvard. Neither, because they were virtuous women, did they question God or the magistrates. They prayed secretly, read the Bible through at least once a year, and went to hear the minister preach even when it snowed. Hoping for an eternal crown, they never asked to be remembered on earth. And they haven’t been. Well-behaved women seldom make history…”

I smile whenever I read those last words. Makes me feel like being sassy is okay. Or if not sassy, at least being able to stand up for what we believe. Although today being a virtuous woman is pretty much taking a stand against the “norm.” Living a life in hopes of that “eternal crown” may seem very out of tune with our culture.

March is Women’s History Month. What’s the history you’d like to make? Do you write it down? One of the reviewers of Ms. Ulrich’s recent book, “Well-Behaved Women Rarely Make History” wrote that “history isn’t simply what happened in the past; it is what later generations choose to remember.” We can help future generations remember by telling our stories.

What’s mine to do

Filed Under Authenticity, Coming out of hiding, Gratitude, Joyous Living, Sparkle | Leave a Comment

Enthusiasm is the yeast that makes your hopes shine to the stars. Enthusiasm is the sparkle in your eyes, the swing in your gait. The grip of your hand, the irresistible surge of will and energy to execute your ideas.
- Henry Ford

Have you ever found something you were really passionate about…a thought or idea that you knew was “yours” to build on, even though it might seem unlikely to others? I’ve come, grudgingly, to realize the idea of inner sparkle is “mine.” Being a fairly serious sort much of the time, this sparkle idea often seems unlikely to me, let alone others to whom this gift hasn’t been given. For months, I’ve really tried to put it aside, pretend it isn’t there, get on to more serious subjects…important subjects. Railing at God that He must have something more important for me to be working on than (aack!) sparkle. Yet the railing does little good, and for my own sanity, I work to investigate my negative thoughts and obstacles to seeing sparkle as something not only valid, but valuable to many people, perhaps even key to living a more joyous and productive life. Couldn’t that thought be just as true?

One of the hiccups is that the word sparkle has the connotation of “bling” but that’s not the kind of sparkle I’m talking about. I’m talking enthusiasm and joy, awe and wonder,204545936_fa331c0bb0_m.jpg appreciation and gratitude for this amazing life.  Letting ourselves fill with those qualities. Fill to overflowing, so that they overflow and send sparkle on to the next person. I smile when I think of those people I’ve seen who are our natural sparklers. People can’t help but lightening up around those kinds of folks. Maybe it’s that they strike something within us that has been covered over and now gets a chance to shine. I think it’s time that more sparkle does happen. More light, more inner peace, more joy, more hope. With this inner sparkle, this enthusiasm, our hopes and dreams may shine to the stars. Do I want to live like that? Do I find that valuable? Do I want to be filled with awe and wonder and enthusiasm? Uhhhhh, yeah.

What would your life be like with more inner sparkle, more enthusiasm? What would you be up to? What makes your heart smile? Where and how can you find more of that?

photo: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/60/204545936_fa331c0bb0_m.jpg

What is calling you out of hiding?

Filed Under Authenticity, Coming out of hiding, Embracing uncertainty, Freedom Challenge, Gratitude, Joyous Living, Sparkle | 1 Comment

As a part of starting a new year, I am in the process of changing many things. Over the last year, I’ve recognized that my work has been changing, taking on a slightly different theme from the one I’d originally started with. I noticed I hadn’t been using my old cards for some time because they no longer “felt right.” So, several months ago, I began working with a long-term friend of mine, Billy Hill , to remodel my logo. “Have you put it on anything besides stationery?” asked Kathy Mallary , somewhat bewildered by my “hiding out.” “Does it have some significance for you? Does it express you and your work is some meaningful way? If so, then let people know about it!” she said. So, here is my remodeled logo - which has tremendous significance for me! The dancer element was the one piece I didn’t want to lose, for a variety of reasons. First of all, even though I’ve not been trained as a dancer, my soul dances all the time, so a logo that expresses me and my work, would naturally include a dancer. This dancer, in particular, leaps with joy and abandon. Secondly, the body of the dancer is made up of a “J” (for Joyous) and an “L” (for Life) - for Joyous LifeWorks. The circle is significant, to me, because it represents being able to come out of one’s shell…sensing the opening and leaping for it…undaunted, and with joy!

Coming out of hiding, coming out from a shell. Exciting, invigorating, a little scary…just because it’s new. Does every new year hold this much hope? Probably, although, maybe because I am getting older, I’m wanting to make “sure” I live my life full out, so each day seems to hold more opportunity - or at least more opportunity that I’m willing to reach for.

Inquiry

What are you hoping to leap for this year? What is calling you out of “hiding?”

Your unique expression

Filed Under Authenticity, Sparkle, Stretching the comfort zone | Leave a Comment

The other night I woke up in the middle of the night and for whatever reason, flipped on the television to the local PBS station. Christiane Northrup was speaking and began to quote famed dancer and choreographer, Martha Graham: “There is a vitality, a life force, an energy , a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. … No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others“‘

from The Life and Work of Martha Graham

I’m not certain how Ms. Graham defined “artist,” but the “vitality” and unique expression she spoke of fits many of us - or could! Perhaps it’s because it’s the new year, or that I spent a good portion of my holidays with family members in their 70’s and 80’s, that I am so wanting to take action to bring my own vitality and unique expression into the world and encourage that in others as well.  What happens if we shut our expression off? Are we somehow depriving the world of some very special gift (even if we don’t see that gift as special)? What if we are all pieces of a magnificent puzzle and our “job” here is to be fully ourselves so that we can fill in our part of the puzzle completely. And if we don’t fully blossom, the pieces of the puzzle just don’t fit together the way they were designed to. Or maybe if you shut off your flow of divine inspiration, the person you were meant to feed or nurture or inspire doesn’t get what they need to grow and flourish. Maybe if we don’t keep the channel open, our own inner sparkle doesn’t get what it needs to flourish. And that inner sparkle is, in my opinion, what gives us the joy, enthusiasm, and passion to live a rich, full, peace-filled life. I am excited and enthused about keeping my channel open, fully aware that my passion for promoting “sparkle” is not for everyone. But as my dear friend and coach extraordinaire, Molly Gordon , told me: “Sparkle is your gift and your responsibillity.” It’s a puzzle piece I want to make sure gets plumped up!

Inquiry

What are some of your unique expressions? Do you recognize a “need” to shut them down in the face of “disapproval” or comparisons? What might help you keep your channel open?

Choosing happiness

Filed Under Embracing uncertainty, Joyous Living, Sparkle, Stretching the comfort zone | Leave a Comment

"People are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."   Abraham LincolnLincoln

 When I read that quote, I imagine I can hear Mr. Lincoln saying those words in a down-to-earth, folksy manner.  Simple, matter-of-fact, this is how it is.  My heart really warms to it, even though it seems TOO simple.  I think we all want to be happy - I know I do, but making up our minds to be happy and sticking to it doesn't seem so simple.  Or maybe once we've gotten to the habit of feeling negative, it's just harder to make up our minds to change.  I was working with a client this morning who has pretty much determined that life isn't going to go well for her, and sure enough, that seems to be how things are turning out.  I think it takes a lot of fortitude to say "I'm going to change my attitude" when you can't see how to be any other way - and particularly if you don't know HOW to make that change.  I realize it's basically developing a new habit, just made a bit more challenging by the subtlety of the negative "voices" and the depth that they've been ingrained.

The biggest boosts for me have been to be more aware of my negative thinking sooner - and having an experience of feeling and behaving in another way.  Catching myself thinking self-defeating thoughts fairly early on - before they take root - is so beneficial.  For example, if I've just made a mistake, I'm able to catch myself right after the first (or second or third) self-berating thought and actually say something to myself along the lines of "Oh, sweetie, it's just a mistake.  It's okay.  What can we do about it/do differently?"  For me, the gentleness is such a blessing!  Bit by bit I am believing that I can make up my mind to be joyous - and keep learning "better ways" as I go along.  The second piece is that recently I've had experiences of the deep, inner sparkle growing brighter and brighter.  Being enthused about life.  Molly Gordon mentioned to be recently "You know, Shawn, sparkle is your gift and your responsibility."  I love the way that resonates so deeply inside me, so that my heart and soul say "YES!".  That (or something like that) gets to be my touchstone.  

So, the Sparkle Class is on it's way! 

Living a full life

Filed Under Authenticity, Embracing uncertainty, Freedom Challenge, Gratitude, Joyous Living, Setbacks as opportunities, Sparkle, Stretching the comfort zone | Leave a Comment

Over the last six months, three of my dear friends have lost their spouses.  Each time, I've been shaken by it, but I guess this third one has felt like a real wake up call.  All the cliches apply:  Life is short; Life is precious; Don't take life for granted; etc.  I want to throw everything that does not matter aside and give my passion and purpose free reign.  How else will I manage to keep finding new levels of inner peace?  Each time I squelch a part of myself that exudes joy, I can feel a bit of my soul shriveling up.  I don't want to die an unlived life!!  I pray that I can keep tapping into this passionate part of myself and help others to do the same, so that our world thrives on the best of ourselves rather than the fear that seems to be running rampant.

Doing what you’re born to do

Filed Under Authenticity, Embracing uncertainty, Freedom Challenge, Gratitude, Joyous Living, Setbacks as opportunities, Sparkle, Stretching the comfort zone | Leave a Comment

Yesterday, I received a "you've got to see this" email from a friend.  She was absolutely right, even though at first glance, I was thinking "Oh, brother!  What is THIS?"   

Here is the link to an amazing video:

http://www.maniacworld.com/Phone-Salesman-Amazes-Crowd.html 

I'm not an opera fan and I don't have much appreciation for these talent shows, but I was so inspired by is this young man's talent (of course…he's THAT good), by some of the things he said (for example, that his singing has always been "his friend"), and that he followed his guidance to do what he knew he was meant to do.   

In the video I saw a seemingly ordinary young man blossom as he stepped in to his knowing of who he is, of what he carries, of his unique gift.  He is doing what he loves to do.  Although we may not have this particular talent, each of us does have some rare or precious gift…and the clue as to what it is will be in what we love - or what we've considered "our friend" throughout life's tough times.  I am so inspired by this "lumpy" young man having the audacity to say, "I sing opera" despite the disdainful looks of the judges.  YES!

This is what I'd like to do - to say "Yes!" to my gifts and to help others say "Yes!" to theirs.  To learn to be audacious enough to say, this is my gift, this is what I love to do!  As I'd mentioned to a friend a while ago, to be able to say, "Yes, I'm weird.  Isn't it wonderful?!!"  What freedom there is in that!  Here is a path to inner peace - to be free to be ourselves, fully, completely, audaciously! 

Where’s my focus?

Filed Under Freedom Challenge, Gratitude, Joyous Living, Sparkle | 2 Comments

I've been fortunate enough to get to spend the last week with my son, Tre, and his family…wife Shelly, 4 year old Serenity, and 2 year old Connor.  Being around the little ones, especially, has been such a treat, reminding me of the joy and enthusiasm I want to continue to maintain.  They are bundles of energy - and such a kick to watch and be with.  At times, though, their energy exhausts me and I start to feel OLD.  But I do know enough about tools for living a joyous life to know that focusing on what doesn't feel great isn't going to do me a whole bunch of good.  Much better to focus on the joy of hanging out with perfect models of unabashed joie d' vivre!  Besides, I really do feel fabulous and am sharing that in a Remember  Your Sparkle teleclass at the end of October http://www.joyouslifeworks.com/courses_teleclasses.htm.

In some way, Divine Inspiration, added to my sense of the rightness of "staying young" in a teleconference I was privileged to be a part of with Jeanna Gabellini and Eva Gregory (www.abundanceabounds.com ) about focusing on what you want and in a post by my dear friend, Adam Kayce (monkatwork.com ) about Joy.  Sure, feeling old is going to happen when you're 50-plus hanging out with a two-year-old, but why dwell on THAT, when I can be inspired by this little gift from God and focus on how big my heart feels when I'm with him?

Are there areas of your life you know you want to be changing the focus on?  What's your "focus dial" dialed to?  Something you want or something you don't?   

Remember when…

Filed Under Gratitude, Joyous Living, Sparkle, Stretching the comfort zone, Success | 2 Comments

Over the last several months, I’ve been enchanted by the idea and experience of “sparkle.”  It sends me back joyous childto being about four or five, when I just loved being myself.  I hadn’t had teachers reprimand me for always wanting to do show and tell.  I hadn’t yet gotten my first (humiliating) birthday spanking in front of my classroom.  Whether or not I did actually sparkle at that age, I don’t know, but what I do know is that when I remember (a full-body remembering) being that age, the feeling that comes over me is a sense of sparkling from within.  And when I feel like I’m sparkling, I am happy, joyous.  I have a sense of being all I need to be.  Like having God’s Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval.  And with THAT approval, I’m good to go!

Personally, I love the idea of sparkle and sparkling.  Still being in touch with that young, enthusiastic, joyous part of me is one of my greatest blessings.  I think that anyone who gets in touch with their sparkle is going to be better off forlittle girl sparkling having done so.  Frankly, I can’t quite understand why not everyone relates to “sparkling” or wanting to sparkle, but they don’t.   And I’ve found myself thinking I should  “dim” my sparkle (you know, change the wording, eliminate the word sparkle), to accommodate those who aren’t raving sparkle fans, but my sparkle joy keeps insisting on being experienced.  So, if my deepest self refuses to dim my love of sparkle to appease those who can’t relate to sparkling, I guess I’ll follow that. And for those who do relate to the idea of sparkling…I say let’s set the world ablaze with our sparkle!   

Inquiry

Do you relate to inner sparkle?  In what way or ways? Do you not relate to sparkle?  Why is that?

Photos:  http://www.flickr.com/photos/myblueeyeguy/188576489/

            http://www.flickr.com/photos/beija-flor/5125391/  

keep looking »