Little miracle

Filed Under Following guidance | Leave a Comment

Don’t you just love it when you pay attention to inner guidance,  follow through on that guidance, and something really beautiful comes of it?

Saying ‘yes’ to guidance

Last night I received an inner urging to go cut some roses and give them to the lovely Russian grandmother who lives across the street and always admires my roses.  This multi-generational family moved in a few years ago and last year the grandparents bought the home next door to the younger generations’ home.  They have worked day and night renovating the place…very hard-working people.  They have seemed to be very nice people, but I have not made a huge effort to befriend them.  Truthfully, I did not even know all their names.  So, offering the roses seemed a little way to be more neighborly.   When I crossed the street with the roses, the daughter was out in front and told me it was her mother’s birthday and she would love the roses!  Their front  door was open and when I called out to them, both of them came to the door and greeted me warmly.  As I was ushered in to the kitchen, I saw two dozen perfect, beautiful florist’s roses.  When I laughingly said she didn’t need my imperfect little bouquet, both of them replied that mine were “special.”   They proudly showed me around their home, all the improvements they had made, which were really lovely.  Our conversation was somewhat awkward, with their halting English and my almost non-existent Russian, but the connection was heartfelt and delightful.  It was such a blessing to have followed the guidance I’d received and to have made such a warm connection to my neighbors.

I often pray that I will get such clear and followable guidance.  I think perhaps I do get such guidance more often than I think, but that I don’t listen or don’t WANT to listen and follow through, for whatever reason.  After such a wonderful experience, I may change the prayer:  that I may hear and say ‘yes’ much more often!

INQUIRY

What is your experience with following guidance - or not listening?  Do good experiences make you want to say ‘yes’ more often?

Releasing Shame

Filed Under Authenticity, Coming out of hiding, Stretching the comfort zone | Leave a Comment

What is it about shame?

Holding on to shame, continuing to harbor negative feelings about our sense of shame, severely limits us from being who we’ve been created to be - we don’t feel great about ourselves because we’re ashamed, feel less than, having to hide something; we aren’t as open as we’d like to be, particularly if we’re seeking authenticity, which so many of us are today.

What kinds of things do women feel shame about?

Well, there are the “big” things lying, cheating, stealing (…oh, Lord, I hate to admit it, I’ve done all of those things at one time or another). The things we did do and the things we didn’t do. And the other things we wouldn’t particularly want our neighbors or colleagues to know about us.

Where does your body hold shame?

Often shame lodges in the belly and/or solar plexus. Begin to notice where you feel your body reacting to the shame you feel about a shame-inducing incident. It feels to me like I’m pulling in, hiding, covering myself.

Go kinda easy on yourself

One of the gifts I’m receiving is an opportunity to heal huge amounts of shame I’ve held on to for years, as well as the more recent stuff. Although some of it feels pretty crappy, there is also space and a peace, particularly as I can open up and let God into those dark and lonely places. I am so grateful that I can see the benefits of this process – as it’s pretty foul stuff that’s coming up. This is what I’ve been asking for…to be clean and used by God. Wouldn’t it be great to appreciate more of our process/journey? Hopefully, more and more with time - I guess this is part of the process, too! It’s not an easy process, but I can feel it will be well worth it.

INQUIRY:

How would your life be more fulfilling with less shame?

Fruitful existence

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“Whatever I choose, I want to be more expressive in all aspects of my life. I’m searching for a really vibrant and fruitful existence. I still believe that the journey, not the arrival, matters. To me, the quest is always more important than the accomplishment.”
- Anthony Hopkins

What does it take to develop that ability to recognize that the quest is more important than the accomplishment? One thing would definitely be to learn to really appreciate the steps along the way; to be able to appreciate the learning, whatever it may be.

Spiritually directed - where?

Filed Under Coming out of hiding | Leave a Comment

Carol Costello and I have been working together as part of her Spiritual Director program through Mercy Center. We’ve come up with the idea of being “God’s Girls.” Imagine my disappointment to find the site for GodsGirls is a PORN site. So disappointing, as I was hoping to connect with other women who feel like they’re God’s Girls. Have to do some checking around. Bummer about the porn site! (I guess those girls are God’s girls, too. Just not the ones I was hoping to find.)

I love working with Carol on this spiritual direction stuff. I am just loving being more and more in touch with God…having more and more of an awareness of His presence in my life. I love thinking of myself as being one of God’s girls…no matter what my age. Having that glow, being vibrantly alive, no matter what other people think, because God’s opinion is the only one that matters…and He loves me being vibrant!