Fumbling towards inner peace

Filed Under Authenticity, Coming out of hiding, Freedom Challenge, Stretching the comfort zone | Leave a Comment

I found this blog with poetry about love, inner peace, broken hearts…   The author's name wasn't apparent, unfortunately.  Here's a snippet: 

Looking deep within to find that place of peace
Opening up your heart to expose nothing but the truth
Vulnerable feelings flow as you find out more and more
Every day a challenge as another layer removed

Yes, isn't inner peace about love?  Loving yourself.  Coming to grips with who you are…warts and all. Finding out more and more…going back to some of the forgotten and buried places and giving them a good cleaning.  Letting the shame and/or judgments be washed away.  At least that's how it's working for me.  I've finally finished a teacher's internship program and realize there's still a hesitation about going out and being seen.  A mentor has been mentioning for some time that I've some issues around fear hindering my stepping out.  I haven't wanted to "go there."  And now, it may be time.  One of the first "reasons" I face when looking at why I hide:  I do try to be a good person, but I've done a number of things I'm sooo not proud of.  The "really awful ones" were a long time ago, they're over and done with.  Except in my mind and in those places I've allowed shame and judgments about them to fester.  No inner peace is gonna grow in that environment!  Phewww!  Bit by bit, though, letting fresh air and healing energy, love, acceptance in - then that peace, and joy, and love can take root and grow.  

I may not ever LIKE some of my past actions, but the idea that I can let go of the shame and judgments?  Yes, that's a distinct possibility.  Another way of being set free.  Free at last, free at last.  Thank God Almighty, free at last.   I'm imagining I'm hearing Martin Luther King, Jr. speak those words.  Was he the one who spoke them so eloquently?   I've so appreciated hearing about him the last few days.  He is one of those who makes me want to play a bigger "game" than the one I am comfortable with…  May we all take greater stands for what is right, and just, and healthy, and holy and whole.

What is calling you out of hiding?

Filed Under Authenticity, Coming out of hiding, Embracing uncertainty, Freedom Challenge, Gratitude, Joyous Living, Sparkle | 1 Comment

As a part of starting a new year, I am in the process of changing many things. Over the last year, I’ve recognized that my work has been changing, taking on a slightly different theme from the one I’d originally started with. I noticed I hadn’t been using my old cards for some time because they no longer “felt right.” So, several months ago, I began working with a long-term friend of mine, Billy Hill , to remodel my logo. “Have you put it on anything besides stationery?” asked Kathy Mallary , somewhat bewildered by my “hiding out.” “Does it have some significance for you? Does it express you and your work is some meaningful way? If so, then let people know about it!” she said. So, here is my remodeled logo - which has tremendous significance for me! The dancer element was the one piece I didn’t want to lose, for a variety of reasons. First of all, even though I’ve not been trained as a dancer, my soul dances all the time, so a logo that expresses me and my work, would naturally include a dancer. This dancer, in particular, leaps with joy and abandon. Secondly, the body of the dancer is made up of a “J” (for Joyous) and an “L” (for Life) - for Joyous LifeWorks. The circle is significant, to me, because it represents being able to come out of one’s shell…sensing the opening and leaping for it…undaunted, and with joy!

Coming out of hiding, coming out from a shell. Exciting, invigorating, a little scary…just because it’s new. Does every new year hold this much hope? Probably, although, maybe because I am getting older, I’m wanting to make “sure” I live my life full out, so each day seems to hold more opportunity - or at least more opportunity that I’m willing to reach for.

Inquiry

What are you hoping to leap for this year? What is calling you out of “hiding?”

Your unique expression

Filed Under Authenticity, Sparkle, Stretching the comfort zone | Leave a Comment

The other night I woke up in the middle of the night and for whatever reason, flipped on the television to the local PBS station. Christiane Northrup was speaking and began to quote famed dancer and choreographer, Martha Graham: “There is a vitality, a life force, an energy , a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open. … No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time. There is only a queer divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others“‘

from The Life and Work of Martha Graham

I’m not certain how Ms. Graham defined “artist,” but the “vitality” and unique expression she spoke of fits many of us - or could! Perhaps it’s because it’s the new year, or that I spent a good portion of my holidays with family members in their 70’s and 80’s, that I am so wanting to take action to bring my own vitality and unique expression into the world and encourage that in others as well.  What happens if we shut our expression off? Are we somehow depriving the world of some very special gift (even if we don’t see that gift as special)? What if we are all pieces of a magnificent puzzle and our “job” here is to be fully ourselves so that we can fill in our part of the puzzle completely. And if we don’t fully blossom, the pieces of the puzzle just don’t fit together the way they were designed to. Or maybe if you shut off your flow of divine inspiration, the person you were meant to feed or nurture or inspire doesn’t get what they need to grow and flourish. Maybe if we don’t keep the channel open, our own inner sparkle doesn’t get what it needs to flourish. And that inner sparkle is, in my opinion, what gives us the joy, enthusiasm, and passion to live a rich, full, peace-filled life. I am excited and enthused about keeping my channel open, fully aware that my passion for promoting “sparkle” is not for everyone. But as my dear friend and coach extraordinaire, Molly Gordon , told me: “Sparkle is your gift and your responsibillity.” It’s a puzzle piece I want to make sure gets plumped up!

Inquiry

What are some of your unique expressions? Do you recognize a “need” to shut them down in the face of “disapproval” or comparisons? What might help you keep your channel open?